S.O.L.

by Emily Orischak

While at the zoo, you can find a monkey

who finds it funny to fling his poop.

He hoots and hollers as he lets it fly

and rarely ever misses his mark.

An impish smile crosses his face

as new targets near his cage.

 

Here I will tell you a grand tale. Mark,

what I say is the truth. If you cannot face

the facts, then this not be your cage.

I was at the zoo in front of the monkey

exhibit, preoccupied by an annoying fly,

when something hit me that smelled like poop.

 

Oh wait, I’m not done, so please do not fly

away. For a similar thing happened to Mark,

my friend with a disfigured face

who injured himself while in a shark cage.

That experience almost made him poop

but not as much as that darn monkey.

 

As I’ve said before, this is no cage

But please stick with me and don’t monkey

around. Now back to the story of the airborne poop.

Trust me, I will make the time fly.

On his last visit to that zoo, Mark

tripped and fell flat on his face.

 

The funny part is he landed in poop

but that primate didn’t let that fly.

For as soon as that naughty monkey

saw my friend raise his face,

it began again. And from even inside that little cage

he never did miss his mark.

 

My friend did get it right in the face

from that primate in the cage

and as luck would have it, poor Mark

was completely covered in poop

while that devil of a monkey

smiled and once again let it fly.

 

Now fly away, my tale is done, of that

monkey in the cage. But poor ole Mark with

poop on his face, was never quite the same.

 

Last Updated: 4/8/13